Miscellaneous Myths: Hera Crashes Zeus’s Wedding

I am sure there is an entirely logical justification for all of this. Do not worry, babe, he can clarify!

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  1. Cool story.

    Still doesn’t make up for all the cheating on your wife Zeus lol!

  2. Honestly if Zeus and Hera were actual people they’d be irredeemable narcissists or psychopaths. There’s just no way to reconcile their behavior with anything we understand as personhood: they embody all the boundaries where personhood ends and monster begins. In a world filled with suffering and unfairness, painting the gods this way is certainly a way to tell a story and maybe try to explain the inherent unfairness of the world, but it’s a damn good thing the gods are *just* fiction. Nearly all of them are living nightmares hiding behind human trappings.

  3. I think Red leveled up for this cover

  4. Replace them with a doll’s got a whole new meaning these days :/

  5. Oh, gods! A thought just occurred to me. You know those couples who go to a bar and flirt with other people to get themselves hot and bothered, essentially using jealousy as foreplay? What if all of Zeus’ “cheating” was just their godly equivalent? Like what if Zeus was literally getting off on making Hera jealous? And I don’t know what would be worse, if Hera knew and was in on it, or if she wasn’t.

  6. No different mythology :⁠-⁠(

  7. I feel like Hera is the embodiment of what wives mean when they break down “WELL YOU MADE ME THIS WAY!” like not to enable unhealthy behavior but some bad husbands do be making their wives nuts yo

  8. You know, having the various Gods being described as their true forms, cobbled together ideas and characteristics that supposedly serve a function barely wrapped up in a human skin, really makes them seem a whole lot more like gods. Or at least aberrant horrors.

  9. I think we can all agree that we can’t take relationship advice from the literal goddess of marriage but can save our marriage by taking advice from a mountain king.

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